Six Steps to Cultivate Resilience During Fertility Treatment

“I don’t know if I can go on.” 

We hear these words a lot at Pulling Down the Moon. And in a year like the one we’re having, these words take on added weight. We’re tired, we’re burnt out and it feels like we’ve used our last drop of mojo just to survive this pandemic…let alone another cycle. 

But you can go on. In fact, you can not only move forward, you can move forward with purpose and strength because you are more resilient than you know. And, resilience is something that can be shored up with some simple steps. 

 Six Steps to Resilience:

1) Allow yourself to be truthful about what you are experiencing and feeling.

Find a place where you can truly and authentically download what you’re going through. One of the biggest ways we become resilient is by combating the tendency to hold on to our negative thoughts and feelings. Seeing yourself reflected in compassionate eyes begins to heal the self-blame and anger that comes with fertility challenges.

2) Nourish yourself with healthy food.

Food not only fuels your body, it impacts your ability to handle stressful situations. Diet impacts brain chemistry in specific ways. Lean protein and complex carbohydrates balance blood sugar and help us maintain emotional balance and healthy fats provide the chemical backbone of mood-managing neurotransmitters. Adding an omega-3 supplement and/or probiotics have also been shown to prevent depression and anxiety. 

3) Get your Zzzzz’s

Give yourself the amount of sleep you need to feel rested and not in need of caffeine, sugar or other stimulants. Researchers have known for years that shift work (working nights or rotating day/night shifts) is associated with depression, obesity, breast cancer, menstrual irregularity, endometriosis, infertility, miscarriage and pre-term birth. There is evidence that melatonin, our sleep/wake hormone, impacts the ability of the uterus to receive an embryo. The fast pace of modern life has put everyone at risk of chronic sleep deprivation. 

4) Stretch and breathe.

Yoga is also the ultimate practice of resilience – we use the poses to bend, but do not break; we hold them with strength. Yoga reduces stress and anxiety and teaches us how to release muscular tension in our body, improve blood flow and lower stress hormones. Yoga works directly on the vagus nerve, stimulating our body’s rest/digest/nest processes that are the physical equivalent to resilience. Through yoga, your body can begin to relax and to heal. Once your body allows itself to relax, your mind will follow. Try our Yoga for Fertility Series starting on Sept 12th or drop-in for our weekly Wellness Wednesday classes starting Sept 15th! 

5) Stay sexy.

Fertility troubles can often take the spice out of an otherwise normal sex life. Exercise regularly so you feel strong and shapely. Splurge on a new nightie that emphasizes your curves and makes you feel like a sex kitten. Make an aphrodisiac meal that you can share by candlelight with your lover. Sex helps you release tension and rekindle the closeness you might be missing as you and your partner work through your challenges.

6) Lighten your load and begin to let go.

Resilience is about discovering what you need to shed. In my 19 years at Pulling Down the Moon, during many of which I was working on my own fertility journey, I have seen that we all wear some negative emotion or belief like a shell. We believe our shell gives us form and shape, and fear that if we release this deeply held belief we will no longer be the same. The shell can be made of many different things – grief, fear, blame, anger. We believe that if we work hard enough and are a good enough person, we will get what we want. Some of us believe our fertility defines us. Resilience is the ability to begin to address these questions and fears, rather than allow them to shape our world. Once we let go, we begin to come out of our shell and take the form in life that reflects our potential. Infertility is a painful process, but one that can allow for immense liberty and personal growth. Don’t be afraid to bend. You will not break!

At Pulling Down the Moon our personalized, holistic approach helps you find the tools to build resilience in body, mind, and spirit. Have questions about how we can help? Contact us at info@pullingdownthemoon.com today!